Infant Cries

I was recently struck by Hosea 7:13b-14a: “I would redeem them, but they have spoken lies against Me. And they did not cry out to Me from their hearts when they wailed upon their beds.” The context is historical, but the principle is eternal. God’s desire was for His people to turn to Him for rescue and deliverance. Unfortunately, at this point in time, they would have none of it! The passage brought several images to my mind. I thought of how I had cried myself to sleep for a year after my mother’s tragic death when I was sixteen. Suddenly, the one constant consolation in a childhood filled with trauma and turbulence was gone! But I don’t honestly remember if I was actually crying out to God. I also remembered how, as a new father, I would bolt out of bed at night at the cry of my newborn daughter, anxious for her well-being. Finally, I thought of a time when I felt totally bankrupt and bereft of any capability to endure a painful relationship. I cried out to God with all my heart and, seemingly within minutes, an unprecedented and sincere confession and apology happened! I came to the conclusion that God, as the best Father, either in heaven and on earth, deeply longs to be the one whom we call upon, from the depths of our heart, for comfort and deliverance. After further thought, I came to the conclusion that, as a child of God, this is my right and my heritage. As a result, I have chosen to practice discovering and connecting with the deeper emotions and unmet needs that tempt me to seek solace through ‘self-medication.’ Self-medication is the process of numbing myself to those very painful feelings. But, instead of repressing and submerging these emotions, I desire to cry out to God from the depths of my heart in order to experience His deliverance and consolation. This is but one way that I will seek to ‘work out my salvation, with fear and trembling’ (Philippians 2:12).